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Kristine Kochanski (Original)
This article is about '''Kristine Kochanski' from Series I, Series II, and. For Kristine Kochanski as she appears on Series VII, and Series VIII visit Kristine Kochanski.'' Kristine Kochanski was the Scottish Chief Navigation Officer aboard Red Dwarf and Dave Lister's unrequited love, though she is completely out of his league. Part of his Plan, not that she knows about that either. In the plan, she was to ride on a horse in Fiji, and be his and Frankenstein's only companion. According to Holly, Lister and Kochanski had exchanged a grand total of 171 words before she and all the other crew died. In "The End", the first episode of Red Dwarf, Kochanski was played by Scottish actress and lead singer of the new wave band "Altered Images", Clare Grogan. Grogan again appeared as Kochanski in the episode "Balance of Power", both in flashback and as a hologram when Rimmer briefly impersonates her. Grogan returned as Kochanski in the second series episode "Stasis Leak", which made major alterations to the character's timeline. Lister, discovering a rip in space/time aboard Red Dwarf 3 million years in the future, and discovering what appears to be a wedding photograph of him and Kristine, returns to Red Dwarf about three weeks before the accident, with the hope of marrying Kochanski per the photo and convincing her to enter stasis with him and survive the accident (or, alternately, he planned to die with her). Although he and The Cat successfully track Kristine down to a hotel at the Ganymede Holiday Inn, he discovers she already has married someone. And that turns out to be another Dave Lister from five years in the future who evidently discovered another method of going into the past (obviously far enough in the past to woo and wed Kochanski). It is clearly established that Kristine knew all about elements of the future, including The Cat and the hologrammatic Rimmer, prior to the accident. This fact strongly implies that she likely did not die in the radiation leak after all. (Due to a scheduling error that resulted in actress Clare Grogan being sent home early by mistake, series stage manager Dona DiStefano briefly plays Kochanski, her face covered, during the final scene of this episode.) Due to the many changes in the timeline established in the series, it's unclear whether any of the events depicted in Stasis Leak will come to pass. Clare Grogan briefly reprised the role one last time during a hallucination of Lister's in the sixth series episode "Psirens". In it she is shown as one of the last surviving crew members of the SS Pioneer led by Captain Tau. The ship had been lured down onto the an asteroid inhabited by the brain sucking GELFs known as Psirens. After seeing Lister, she tells him to stay back and get out of the belt, and tells him that they will never take them alive, her and her two kids. The children are named Jim and Bexley, Lister's sons derived from the sperm bank Kochanski used back on Red Dwarf. In the end the rest of the Starbug crew keep Lister from falling for the ruse set by the Psirens. Liverpudlian actress Alexandra Pigg was originally cast in the role of Kochanski, but was unavailable for new recording dates following an electrician's strike, so the part then went to Clare Grogan. Lister's fantasy of his perfect companion in "Camille" was initially intended to be Kochanski (played by Clare Grogan once again), but it was felt that the inexplicable and implausible re-appearance of Lister's true love (or at least enduring obsession) would tip him off too early as to the true nature of the creature that Kryten rescued. The character was changed in clothing and attitude to more or less a female version of Lister, played by Suzanne Rhatigan, but the credits incorrectly identified her as "Kochanski Camille". In "Back to Reality", Anastasia Hille briefly appears as Kochanski. In the episode, it is suggested that the events of the series up to this point had been a Better Than Life-style immersive game. It is established that Kochanski is a character created by the game (as opposed to a player character). When Lister briefly glimpses a game-in-progress through a monitor he sees a tall blonde, decidedly non-Scottish Kochanski on Starbug in a romantic embrace with an alternate version of Lister. In the Series VII episode RD:Ouroboros, Kochanski returned to the series, now played by Chloë Annett. This version of the character came from an alternate universe and, though she shared some traits with the Clare Grogan version (including being Scottish), was substantially different in many ways, and as such is considered a different character than the one featured in the first six seasons (see Kristine Kochanski). Multiple Incarnations After the publication of the first two Red Dwarf novels, Grant and Naylor took the opportunity to re-write several aspects of the back story. The crew of the Dwarf pre-accident increased by a thousand, the pre-accident setting moved from the 21st to the 23rd century, and Kristine Kochanski underwent her first major transformation. In series one, Lister lusted after Kochanski, a perky working class girl made good, but never had a relationship with her. Indeed, he was said to have shared a total of 171 words with her, rating her below his potted plant in this respect. In the first novel, she appeared to either be more of a social climber or (more likely) to have started further up the social ladder. She is learning Japanese and holds her own against arrogant young officers. Lister has a brief but intense relationship with her, spending most of the time in her quarters making love and watching "It's a Wonderful Life", their favourite movie. Kochanski, however, reveals she is still hooked on her ex-and-future boyfriend Tim, a catering officer. She was dating Lister on the rebound, and goes back to Tim, leaving Lister heartbroken. Although most of the alteration brought in after the books begin at series three, the first series after the publication of the first book, the onscreen depiction of Kochanski stayed the same. The same actress (Clare Grogan) portrayed her (for the most part), and she remained the cheeky yet spunky Scottish lass of the first two series. The portrayal of Kochanski in the books is broadly compatible with both this portrayal and Chloë Annett's later portrayal. In both the book and the later series versions, it is Kochanski's rejection of him that leads Lister to his plan with Frankenstein and the stasis booth. Last Human Kochanski also appears prominently in the Red Dwarf novel Last Human, written by Doug Naylor. As with all of the Red Dwarf novels, however, Last Human is not considered part of the television canon due to significant variations between the television and book continuities. Kochanski's role in the novel — as a new member of the crew — is similar to that of her role in the seventh and eighth series of the television series (though she is more canonically related to the original television Kochanski as she is from the main Red Dwarf universe), with notable differences: In the novel, following being reunited with Lister as an aged couple in a world where time runs backwards (following the death of Dave Lister in the 'real' universe), Kochanski and Lister have entered into a loving relationship with each other. Now part of the Red Dwarf crew, Kochanski is in a clear position of authority as the highest-ranking member of the crew — a fact that Rimmer clearly resents (having been robbed of what minuscule authority he could claim in that position), although the others either appreciate or at least do not mind her clear intelligence and competence. The novel ends with Kochanski and Lister, stranded on an idyllic world in an unknown parallel universe, attempting to start a family with help from the Luck virus. Category:Characters